Why I Love George Steinbrenner

Some people have a misconception of what I do. I am not a journalist, I am a columnist. A journalist lives in a world which must be represented as existing without bias (unlikely, but hideable); a columnist however, well we have the pure unadulterated joy of presenting opinions. And opinions, well, opinions really are nothing if not based within bias. This is why I find it very hard not to cheer unabashedly for that stubborn of stubborn, cantankerous of cantankerous owners: George Steinbrenner. I can hear your gasp from here, ‘my god, I never suspected Achanceyougottatake Sports of being a closet Yankee supporter…’ Ahh, but here’s the rub, I am nothing if not a fervent (if pessimistic) BLUE JAYS supporter, which makes me detest the Yankees with a passion normally reserved for mosquitoes in summer. Maybe I do not hate them with the same feverish passion of a Red Sox fan (another team I cannot help but detest…), but I find their continued success both depressing and nauseating, like watching a homeless person extricate a cigarette butt from the roadside gutter. This is why I cannot help but love George Steinbrenner. He is nothing if not abused publicly for his iron-clad control of the Yankees, but I think he is a national treasure. Frankly the man should win an award, a medal, heck, give him the medal of valor, or rename the darn thing after him. He’s a fantasy geek who cannot stand losing, but of course, fantasy geeks do not actually understand the subtleties of the game as much as they think they might. It’s easy to say, I want Alex Rodriguez, Randy Johnson, Gary Sheffield, and Jason Giambi and if you’re a fantasy player, or an owner with a 200 million budget it’s even easier to go out and get them. But as the 2003 Lakers or 2002 – 2005 Real Madrid can tell you, all the superstars in the world, and a buck fifty will get you a cup of coffee (which actually isn’t even true, because where in the world can you buy a cup of coffee for a buck fifty any longer?). As the fan of a team which hasn’t finished above third in 8 years, let alone winning the World Series four times, it might be hard to see their plight, but the Yankees loss in the ALDS was their earliest playoff exit since 1995, and worse still, it ensured a fifth straight World Series-less season. And apparently the George is fuming. To which I say... ehhhx-cellent!

I love George Steinbrenner because when the Yankees lose, he goes, proverbially, off the deep end. He fumes, he exhorts, as his friend the Donald would say, somebody gets fired. It makes for good press, it’s funny, but best of all… it’s bad for the Yankees. People forget that when the Yankees run of World Series titles began, it was with Steinbrenner relegated to the sidelines. In an exceptional “Steinbrennian” moment, he had been “suspended for life,” for paying gambler Howard Spira 40,000 to dig up dirt on Dave Winfield (Winfield was suing the Boss over 300,000 which Winfield’s contract stipulated Steinbrenner donate to the player's charity… naturally the boss had not, ya just have to love him, why pay the charity when you can pay a gambler far less to smear Winfield!). Fortunately for all of us, the life suspension only lasted 3 seasons and in 1993 the Boss was reinstated, but it was enough to remove him from the day to day operations of the team. The roster that won championships in 1996, 1998, 1999, and 2000 was the sole responsibility of Gene Michael and his deputy Brian Cashman. It was only after the freak broken bat 2001 World Series loss that the Boss stepped in and started making demands. Each offseason since, his demands and his chase of players have given the Yankees a completely new direction. A little like Chicken Little, only running around screaming about the sky falling with his head cut off… The beauty is that George is based in Tampa, where he is surrounded by “his baseball people.” But they naturally differ from the New York baseball people, giving the Yankees a confused morass at the top which has produced a wondrous succession of haphazard results. I mean, how do you insult a playoff warrior like Andy Pettitte with a low ball offer, a guy who has won more playoff games for you than any other pitcher? But George, thank you for doing so, because not only did it make your team a little worse, it convinced Roger Clemens to join his best friend in Houston and make history with two insane seasons. to think we might have missed out on seeing the most exceptional swan song in history if not for your prescient, benevolent ways…

So this off season, after another disappointing postseason, I can trust that the Boss will reward my love with another cagey off season. Please George, throw big money at Florida pitcher AJ Burnett (a pitcher bound to combust in the New York spotlight); designate Alex Rodriguez for assignment after his “Dog-like” playoff performance; neglect to see what an exceptional managing job Joe Torre did this year with an ill matched roster. That’s right, fire his ass. I mean really, the bum hasn’t brought home a World Series ring in FIVE seasons, what good is he. Hire Lou Pinella, a fiery manager whom we know you will have some wondrous public spats with. Please, it wont just be entertaining, it will be bad for the Yankees and that is something I truly love.

Playing Darts in the Pub after Eight Pints (or my vain attempts at playoff predictions):

Last year, the Cardinals and Astros played baseball at an exceptional level for seven games, only because the Yanks and Sox were clashing in the North East, nobody noticed (well, nobody outside of the mid-West anyway). It’s a shame really, because with the exception of Boston’s ninth inning game 4 comeback victory, the NLCS consistently produced better games. The teams hit a NL record 25 homeruns, including walk off homers to settle both games 5 and 6, the home team won each and every game , and the Cards ultimate victory could certainly have swung the other way with a little luck. This year, baseball fans are fortunate enough to have another crack at watching topflight baseball. Last year both teams packed power up and down their lineup, and had solid staffs that were missing stellar starters (both of this years game 1starters, Petite and Chris Carpenter, missed last years playoffs through injury), but this year sluggers Scott Rolen, Jeff Kent, and Carlos Beltran are not playing, while Larry Walker, Jim Edmonds, and Jeff Bagwell are diminished by age. What the teams have instead are balanced, crafty lineups, capable of squeezing out runs with timely hits, savvy base running, and controlling the games with dominant pitching (both starting and relieving). The Astros pitch a little better, but the Cards hit a little better. It almost comes down to the flip of the coin, which means I’m going to give the edge to the home field advantage holding Cards.
Cards in Seven.

The ALCS is also a match of extremely even, well balanced teams. Neither are great offensively, with only one pants wetting slugger apiece (the Angels’ Guerrero and White Sox’s Konerko), but both teams pitch well, play solid defense and do the little things which win games. Frankly, I’m just happy not to have to watch Yanks – Red Sox again, although I imagine that executives at Fox are not with me there… The Angels are hamstrung by both potential fatigue (the Sox swept the Red Sox, while the Angels crisscrossed the country to beat the Yanks in five) and (worse) by the loss of ace Bartolo Colon, but I like something about their manager, Mike Scioscia. He’s crafty, he’s been here before, and I think he makes the difference.
Angels in Six.